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Old Feb 01, 2015, 02:00 PM
Anonymous200320
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brown Owl View Post
Do you think there is any chance of my T adapting to how I wish my therapy was? It's not really the emotions that are the issue - it is the fact of her not probing me to understand the things I say and not giving me more space to talk, not sitting with how things look to me for a while before she gives her thoughts, it's the fact of her thoughts being so dominant in there I feel overpowered. I have tried to ask for this, I don't know how well I expressed it. Her response was to suggest that I don't want to do therapy that I just want to talk as friends. This pissed me off somewhat. Despite my denial she continued to suggest this, at my final appointment she repeated this, saying I had a problem with being a client and then said 'you are my patient'. It was only after woods I thought how peculiar this was and felt a bit angry. She also suggested that I don't have faith in psychotherapy because my mother doesn't. This pissed me off too as I have huge faith in therapy.

I suppose there really is no chance of her adapting. Even now I think shall I go to see her one more time to try? But having written this it has reminded me why I decided this is not therapeutic anymore. Quitting is so so hard. I don't really want to quit. I have an appointment with a new T on Wednesday. She sounded nice on the phone.
I'm sorry you are going through this. It doesn't sound to me as if your old T is the right one for you. I would not do very well with a T who didn't give me space, and who pushed her opinions on me... to be honest, that's much more like "talking with friends" than my experience of therapy, which involves a patient T who validates my emotions, is not afraid of long silences, and is super respectful when he tells me his opinion.

But I understand that it is hard to quit. You have invested a lot in this therapist. I am very glad that you are meeting with another T, and I really hope she'll be a good match for you.