I have to say, it does seem like you are shooting yourself in the foot with all these worries...you are assuming off the bat that all the responses have some kind of negative drive behind them. If I was viewing the world through that lens, I would be exhausted and could not be bothered trying to find a new therapist. What pushes you to keep searching even though they are all not good enough in their replies? I am curious.

I think you need to give somebody a chance, take the leap of faith, accept that sometimes they won't reply in an ideal way to information you venture, but that can still be okay. A dialogue between two people is going to be like that. They are not going to say the things you feel they should say.

What about having a chat with a real-life friend, somebody who knows you well and could help you assess are you sabotaging things before they even get off the ground for some reason that is not quite clear?