Quote:
Originally Posted by PaulaS
Iīm searching for a new T and Iīm not on meds or within psychiatric care. Iīm searching for a psychotherapist within the psychodynamic field. I wouldnīt dare do anything near commiting suicide, that is taking pills and so on but I still think my life has no value at all.
I would want to be honest with a T about my thoughts and to be able to say things like I donīt think my life is precious, itīs pointless and small improvements wouldnīt do any difference. I donīt cry when I think about life this way, itīs nothing extraordinary about it. Thereīs no chance of building the life I want and I will always be disappointed even if I changed some parts in my life to the better. My life is already over in that aspect.
If I tell a T about this I see thereīs a big risk that most T:s would just tell me that they doesnīt work with clients like me. Or is it safe telling a T stuff like this? Anyone who has talked about this? (Not within psychiatric care)
Even if I think my life wonīt get anywhere near what I want it to be I want a T so everyday life can be a bit more bearable.
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I think that a good and competent T should be capable of listening and understanding when you are not an actual physical danger to yourself or anybody else. Yes, I have said very similar things to my T. He has never suggested any kind of hospitalisation or other drastic measure. He did suggest medication, but never pushed it (in fact, the first thing he did when I started seeing him as a pdoc was to take me off the medication I was on - much later he suggested another kind of med, but again, that was just a suggestion.)
Yes, all Ts are different and not everybody will react in the same way. But there is also no requirement that you open up about everything at once, before you know whether the person you are talking to seems trustworthy.
I very much relate to what you say about life being basically unchanging, by the way. There are things I would like to get out of life which I am not going to get. That's just life. My T is having a hard time agreeing with me about that, but that doesn't make him a bad T, it is just something we disagree on, and it doesn't invalidate the good things therapy do for me.