I also am really uncomfortable with the tone of the posts being made to Growlithing. I totally agree with you Growlithing that it would have been preferable if she had warned you she was going, and that she should not have suggested that Pdoc to you cos of her association with him. I think that many of us here fall somewhere along a continuum of obsession with the person we talk to, which ranges from thinking of them pretty much constantly to them being a re-assuring presence that we would not wish to be without. To be on the wrong end of the continuum is a really painful place to be and a really hard place to get out of, if there was an easy solution to escaping this, Growlithing would have found it. I think Growlithing needs support not condemnation. She is not the only one facing this issue on this board. I am sending you hugs Growlithing.