Quote:
Originally Posted by AzulOscuro
You are right, but I'm a little bit radical than you. I don't believe in the effect of criticims. You can teach a child with careful and patience how to act in the right way: with an explanation or better with your model, but we shouldn't critisize a child bc in the end, (s)he is learning.
I see it everyday in my classroom. They learn in the way I explain above, and at the same time they are happy learning and feel safe in relation to what they can do and what you can do for them.
But, Orvel, our parents lack of experience and they didn't know that they were wrong.
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I've read "The road less traveled". It was recommended by my therapist. It is interesting. The book says that there needs to be a healthy level of criticism, I also believe this. Classroom on the other hand is a different thing. You can't really know every child.
Well, my sister turned out fairly well, but then again ... she always was "daddy's little princess". If things don't go the way she wants, she goes to him and cries. If she does something wrong, he generally gets angry just a little bit. I do something wrong, it's the end of the world. She fights with mom and can't win, so she goes to dad so that he can defend her and reason with mom. I always got all the pressure from him... even today... "you should go out and find a girl!". I've never heard him say "you should find a boyfriend!" to my sister. My sister teases me in a painful spot, I fight back. He says "Hey! Children you should get along". Why didn't he defend me when she attacked me? Because he from time to time added to the teasing together with her, like I deserve it! I called him out a few weeks ago on this, he laughed cynically. When he saw that I was being really serious and hurt for this, he was a bit sad and tried to make jokes to somehow save the situation.
Yes, I understand ... they think they know what is best for us FROM THEIR POINT OF VIEW.