I've been long lurking but I decided to unlurk (delurk?) in order to make sure you got proper response. Clearly a case of over-controlling-ness but here I am, so...

Not feeling a lot is also an issue for me. I recently changed therapists in large part to work on trying to change this. Assuming it's not an intrinsic part of me. That would be okay, too, as long as I knew it was that.

I think if you told your therapist, that's something s/he could help you with. And naming it; getting that out into the room, could remove the secondary stress that comes from being asked to do something you don't know how to. I would also tell the pdoc to make sure your meds are working right.

I'm really glad you had the courage to write your history down and share it with a caring therapist. You shouldn't have to carry all that alone.

MB, just know I made you my first post on here because it was important to me to respond to you.