Quote:
Originally Posted by growlithing
Does my biological mother love me? She has a word that she calls love that she feels for me. Although I guess she hasn't said she loves me in a long time. But I do not believe that you can simultaneously love someone and beat them, and lock them in their bedroom for 12+ hours with no food. I don't think you can love someone and make them take off their pants in a parking lot and stand on a scale so you can yell at them for being ugly and fat. If someone's version of love involved that behavior being acceptable, then how they define love does not interest me and I do not want it.
She pays for things because she thinks that money = love. And to an extent for her, she does think that. That's fine I guess. I'll take it but she can't buy my forgiveness or my love. That is gone. I have no interest in a relationship with her and I will never love her.
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Sorry for your experiences. I have very very emotionally and verbally abusive mean and rude father and am still dealing with it in therapy and am almost 50. I never dealt with it in younger age. My mother is not abusive but extremely unavailable as her goal in life is to please my dad because she is scared of him. Nothing else matters to her
I appear to be very successful and very put together. It is not the case inside. I am very damaged.
I react to your posts strongly and I apologize for being too harsh but I just do it because I want you to do everything you can to heal now, not wait till u 50 to finally address it properly.
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