Thank you Gayle for taking the time to write me.
You are absolutely right about the distorted thinking. I deal with that in every area of my life. I have low self-esteem/confidence...there are oftentimes that I hate myself. The OCD just drives me crazy...and there are times I feel like I will never get out of this hole.
Thank you for the link and I will be sure to check it out.

I do try the breathing exercises and oftentimes become too aware of breathing. And it exacerbates my anxiety but I think I need to learn how to master it.
Maybe that is my problem.
I also need to learn something about meditation.
I know that drinking does help the entire situation....but honestly...when those intrusive thoughts come into play.....and I have a drink...it stops it.

I am doing a little better.
I need to keep busy....keep reading and learning about this illness...and get help.
All steps which I am taking....I just want to be happy again.

Thank you again Gayle.