Okay, so I don't really know where to put this post but it has to do with a relationship. I have been dating this guy for a while. He is 35 and I am 18. Is this wrong? I feel guilty about it now. I mean we haven't done anything; but I have done things for him through video. I feel ashamed about it now because I can never take it back. I don't want to leave him because I don't want to hurt him. I also feel stuck in this relationship. I mean we have talked about everything. I don't know what to do.

Also, I tried to break up with him yesterday and he dropped the suicide bomb. Me being upset and all I tried to take him back. Now I feel guilty.

I did leave him today. Is it bad that I still crave sex from him. I mean we never had sex; but the desires are still there. I still have feelings for him. I let him go, but I still love him. Am I wrong to feel this way? I mean he is 35 and I'm 18. I wanted to have a life with him--to have children. I really fell in love with him. He satisfied something in me that no one else has before. Half of me just wants him for sex, but the other half really wants a relationship. I'm so confused because my feelings are different than what I just did.