well i saw sandy webs post about cyber sex....so i dont hijack her post i decided to make my own post because i am very very confused. When i was younger like 14/15 i loved the internet and i always wanted a big brother...it will come together later....well i had a guy cousin who was like 23 at the time and we used to talk alot. I looked up to him as a big brother. And then all of sudden we were online talking....and he told me he was mast*rbting.....and i was like eww dont tell me that....and then he started telling me things he wanted to do with me.....and i was scared speechless...i was like what????? What are you doing....and then after he kept doing this for awhile he came over to my house when no one was home....and he said he wanted to kiss me and all that....and he went into the bathroom and told me he needed toliet paper and i went to give him some and he...exposed himself to me...and i slammed the door terrified....now here is the sad horrible horrible part on my account...its partly my fault...i so wanted a big brother..i wanted to be protected and loved and everything and when he wouldnt shut up online about stuff he wanted to do with me i just was like yea...uhuh...i let him go on and on...i told him to stop but he didnt...so after awhile i gave up....i gave up trying...i LET him kiss me...i LET him come over to myself and i feel so bad....i feel so horrible..i mean WHY did i let him do that??? So thats not considered abuse is it??? What does that mean??? What does that mean........im so confused...is it my fault?? He leaves me alone now....mainly because i was around 16 when he told me hed take me to the mall (the same things i wanted from like a big brother) and when i refused to kiss him or do it with him at the back of the mall...then he stood me up and never showed up...i was devistated..and the next time after that i screamed at him online and said i wont take it anymore and i will only talk to him if he doesnt say anything at all about that...like i would IM him and the first thing he would say was....i think your soooo hot what do you want ...or one time he told me i went to the bathroom and in that time he stole my underwear from my drawer....what do any of you make from this??? I no longer really have any contact with him...but that so confusing for me....i am sooo confused on how to handle this...any comments would be appreciated and if it is really my fault please tell me and i will definitly do a turn around and check myself and my actions.