I'm so happy.. I can finally see myself I finally know who I am..

I don't know what happened.. I got a message from someone I don't know very well asking me if I could look after her dogs. I told her I've been suffering from stomach trouble for a long time and she asked me if I knew what was wrong. It's been over a day since I received her message and I was struggling with my reply to her.

The thing is, I feel I can't be honest about the reason for my stomach problems.. I believe they're a stress reaction to growing up with a dad I was dead scared of.. But no one has believed me that my dad was so scary because his anger is 'invisible'.. Like, 'I'm so not going to give you what you need!' but still keeping a tight grip on me.. Officially, I've been diagnosed with Irritable Bowel Syndrome and have been telling people this is what I have.. But now, suddenly, I didn't want to write those words down..

I sent my T a text asking her to validate my fear of my dad, and she did.. And now I suddenly feel like it doesn't matter if no one else believes me.. That I know the truth and can see myself, and my T has seen me, and that's enough! I finally know who I am.. that my emotions are my own