I think Simon Baron-Cohen is the one with the empathy deficit...

I like what I read somewhere about how people with autistic spectrum don't seem to lack empathy... They seem full of empathy for each other... It is more that they are differently empathetic. I really like the cat-dog analogy. The idea being that dogs are social animals who are responsive to hierarchy whereas cats are more solitary. You see a puppy approach a kitten trying to make friends and there is a fundamental disconnect. The puppy is too boisterous and gregarious and it overwhelms and frightens the kitten. Telling the kitten to 'get on in there!' isn't likely to help... The puppy needs to chill out and back off and... Read the signals, I mean really, sheesh... ;-)

And it isn't that cats aren't affectionate... You just need to give them a quiet and the space so that they get the opportunity to approach you. You need to quit grabbing at them with your grabby hands and show a little... Dignity. Or something. Sniff.

I've heard that girls often appear more socialized than boys because girls are more social, generally, so the Aspie girl is more likely to find herself groomed by some other girl... Taken under their wing, basically. Girls are also a bit more... Stereotypical... In their social interaction. How hard is it to squeel 'oooooooooooooooh meeeeeeeeee toooooooooooo'. ? Easier than pulling off macho on the sports field...

Also... Slightly stereotypical... But looking like an awkward gangly bambi just works out better for girls than for guys...

Apparently girls obsessions are more likely to be horses or dogs or other pets... But liking to... Line models of them up, for example, more than play with them in more usual ways. Apparently classical literature / literary novels is also a common obsession for girls... That it is perhaps part of a quest to figure out 'normal' (doggy / pack mentality) human psychology.