I'm feeling really bad about missing my classes, birthday parties, gatherings etc. I have a very special and unique opportunity in NYC - in a program that's really hard to get into (I still don't know how/why I did...) - and I feel like I'm wasting it away, that someone else would get so much more out of it.

The worst part is that I skipped seminar not when I was depressed but after...I seriously feel like I've been hit by a bus or a bad flu and need recovery time, emotionally and in terms of getting back on track with my overdue work/deadlines, but I still feel really guilty. I'm also nervous about going back and having to face my friends who are asking where I am and why I haven't been showing up.

This all just makes me sort of sad and disappointed in myself.