gmsg, I'm so sorry for all that's been going on. I think seeing a therapist together could be helpful, but if he doesn't want to go, I'm not sure what you can do. Would he see a therapist on his own first to try to deal with some of his anger? He has an attorney, but do you? It sounds like he is considering various legal actions (e.g. his custody desires) and timetables. How active are you in this? Do you and he talk at all about your divorce plans so you are on the same page? I would urge you not to be passive. Talk with your lawyer, get into mediation with a divorce mediator, see a family therapist together, talk as much as you are able with him. Best of luck!