Hi, Tuney. Welcome to the boards.

I found your story very interesting and very well put. Could that be that I feel I tend to go on and on when I write, too? LOL

There were some similarities in our stories. When my mom passed, I went over the edge, too. My therapist told me it was all the unresolved issues I had with her. Things are much better... and they should be after 20+ years. LOL But there is still one thing that doesn't seem to want to go away and that was never having my mom's acceptance or knowledge of who I really was.

Becoming of age came in the early 60's for me but all I ever wanted to be was a wife and a mother. My mom wanted me to have titles upon titles after my name. She never got over the fact that I had no interest in that. It was because of her own issues that she wanted to live her life vicariously through me but she never stopped to recognize her own stubborness in Me!

Well... now I'm digressing, but I do see some of my own issues in your life.