I´ve been looking for a new T for some time and I´ve now found one or two T:s that I see as possible to start therapy with. I think it´s the most natural thing, T:s having a personal life and I understand it´s also natural as they are much older, that they have partners, children and grand-children.

I´m not expecting to find or look for a T who´s single and without children as myself even if that would make me feel more at ease perhaps. But still, knowing about their personal lifes, I now mean basic facts as being with a partner and having children, nothing more in detail, bothers me.

I don´t know if I´m just jealous, I don´t think so. I´m not at all sure I even want children of my own. Perhaps it´s some kind of power unequality but there´ll always be that way regardless of the T:s personal life. I mean, the T will always have more power than me in a therapeutic relationship.

I don´t want to bring it up when I only saw them a couple of times or so and haven´t decided if I´ll start therapy. I think I feel a bit distant to T:s because of this, knowing they live family lives, seeing relatives on the weekends and so on. Their life seem to be so very different from mine and I feel weak not being capable to create a more satisfying life of my own.

Anyone who can relate to this? Any explanations around this matter?