Feeling down & tired today but my racing thoughts have slowed as well. It feels like depression is very close like reach out & touch it close but kinda feel idk like I can control whether I go there or not. I'm such an over-doer & put on a happy face so it's hard for me to say I can't go do this or that cause I just need down time but I did that this morning which I think is positive. Change is hard even when I'm motivated but I do want to break out of these life long patterns. I fear disappointing others so much it's ridiculous but I guess this is a process like everything else.