Thread: Is it rape?
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nismay
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Member Since Feb 2015
Location: United States
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Trig Feb 07, 2015 at 08:21 PM
 
I was 16. My friends and I liked to drink and looking back we drank quite a bit for a group of 16 year old girls, splitting a 30 pack of beer between 4 or 5 of us was normal and we could hold our alcohol, seeming not as drunk as we should have been after binge drinking 6 beers as petite 16 year old girls. So naturally when my friends parents were out of town we were thrilled to have a house to party in for the night. The night began like most, a great night getting drunk with my best guy and girlfriends. Late into the night a boy and I ended up in one of her bedrooms being drunk teenagers, doing a little bit more than kissing but not having sex. Being a virgin I knew that drunkly at a party with a guy friend that I wasn’t even dating was not how I wanted to lose my virginity. With this mindset I wanted to make sure that that didn’t happen. One of the last things I remember clearly is saying, “I just don’t want to have sex though, okay?” He agreed. After this I either blacked out or passed out, I’m still not sure which. The next thing I remember is coming to, he’s on top of me and kind of flys up, I was confused what was happening, got up still in my underwear and got dressed. I think he went back to keep drinking, I laid down and went back to sleep. The next day I was so confused what had happened, I knew I didn’t want to have sex so I just assumed we didn’t, maybe I knew and didn’t want to admit it. For the next week I convinced myself that indeed I was still a virgin and we had not had sex. Until I was talking to one of his friends, who informed me that he had told him that we did have sex… what. I didn’t know how to take that, so I just told myself that I shouldn’t have put myself in that position, that he was as drunk as me and therefore couldn’t be blamed for that, and that it had happened so it was time to grow up move on and forget about it. And I did, barely thinking about it for the next 5 years. Until recently when events somehow stirred it all up again and I started to question what had happened. I’ve never had a serious boyfriend; instead I had a promiscuous stage, never letting any guys get too emotionally close, trusting people is tough for me, and letting my walls down is just not something I easily do. I started to think that maybe this event had affected me more than I thought. I am just curious as what others think about this.

Last edited by FooZe; Feb 07, 2015 at 08:45 PM.. Reason: added trigger icon
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