Hello dainbramage: Welcome to PsychCentral. PC is a great place to gain support, learn strategies for handling mental health concerns, & to make internet friends. There are many wonderfully supportive members here on PsychCentral. One forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be:

Depression - Forums at Psych Central

I know a thing or two about destroyed lives... both my own & the others whose lives I destroyed along the way. It's kind-of like the old saying about: "just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get you." "Just because you're depressed, doesn't mean your life isn't a shambles."

I guess the one thing I do have going for me is that I am married & my wife buoys me... although even this has its downside. (It's a long, convoluted story.) I am a student of the ancient Tibetan Buddhist practices called Lojong, as taught during our time by the Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön. Pared down to it's simplest elements it is summarized by the Signature quote that appears below. I have made two serious attempts to get rid of myself in the past, the most recent just about 3 (?) years ago. Without the Lojong teachings I would still be trying...

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