I'm posting this here but I'm not bulimic. It's probably still the area it fits my problem best.

I was diagnosed with an unspecified eating disorder in 2012. I mostly starved myself and threw up every now and then. I was in therapy for two months because of that and other issues which gave me enough motivation to try and change and concentrate on more positive aspects of my life. I still wasn't alright after therapy but I managed... I spent most of this time in a grey area between normal eating and disordered eating. You could say I wasn't fine but I was okay.
Maybe it is a coincidence but I stopped taking antidepressants in early 2014 and a few weeks later I started throwing up again. I was studying for my final exams in April and I just stopped caring. I studied and while studying a ate and then I went to the bathroom and threw up and then I continued to study and eat and then I threw up again, and so on. I calmed down in the end and went back to "normal". Since then there have always been some days every few months where I did the same thing, although not as extreme with maybe one or two binges a day for two or three days.
It is quite bad at the moment. I have been throwing up at least once a day for over a week now, I feel like **** (I don't know how people manage to do this for months or even years) but I can't stop. I made myself some cereals this morning and planned to keep them down but I purged anyway. It was almost more of a reflex than a conscious decision.
I know that I should stop but I simply don't care enough. Logic isn't really working here. I think- This is stupid, you're spending too much money on food, you're disgusting, you're damaging your body, there's no point in doing this and then I realise that I don't actually care and do it again.
How can I make myself want to stop?