Now I have not been hospitalized and am sometimes told I'm bipolar 1 and sometimes that I am bipolar 2 depending on the pdoc but here is my deal...

I am 32 years old and I have three children. My baby is 7weeks! I was not on meds for my first two pregnancies but stayed on Lamictal and klonopin as needed and I am still doing that while nursing.

Meds: I don't know what you're on or what works for you but Lamictal is great for pregnancy and breastfeeding. It is listed as compatible with breastfeeding in the Dr. Thomas Hale bfing bible that all the med professionals use. I consulted perinatalogists before my last preg and they said that I had no more reason to worry on lamictal than a woman who wasn't on it. So I never looked back. Given past experiences I knew I could not go off my meds.

Pregnancy wise the first trimester was tough for me and I had some real depression. My morning sickness was sooooo bad and that really helped to crash my mood. That plus the wacky hormones and the crazy fatigue. But it all went away around 12 weeks.

I think I got a little manicky at one point but I was also on pelvic rest (no sex or orgasm) which would prob make anybody a little ummm hypersexual but I think I may have gotten a little more worked up than I needed to. I got stressed towards the end of pregnancy waiting for labor to start and it was starting to crash my mood and I was talking to my pdoc about whether or not I should push for an induction. I wouldn't have asked the OBs or brought up the bipolar but I would have just said I was getting very stressed. As it happened I went into labor on my own.

Sleep and breastfeeding. My husband,pdoc, and I all decided that I needed to get real sleep no matter what. Having already been successful breastfeeding twice I knew what I was up against. I decided to put sleep first and if breastfeeding didn't work than that was just how it was meant to be.

For the first two weeks I got up once a night. My husband sleeps with the baby in another room and he would come and get me for a feed sometime in the middle of the night and he gives her bottles for all the others. Now I just sleep through the night. I have to pump like crazy when I wake up though even if I am going to feed her. Just tooooo full. And that is the important part. That you get yourself totally emptied (well you're never totally emptied but it will make sense) so you don't get clogs and mastitis. I had clogs with my first baby but never had a problem with the others because I had figured it all out.

Anyway, my husband has been a rock star. He has take. The nights on for me but really it is for all of us because we need eachother and he knows what I need to be able to carry on with all of the responsibilities I have in our family. I am sooo lucky to say that I have not been sleep deprived at all.

So if your husband can do it that is great. If you can afford a night nurse or if you have a great relationship with your mom or mother in law or grandmother etc then they could help.

So far my supply has been great. I try to nurse as much as possible during the day especially during the first weeks because that is when you body figures out how much milk to make. And I pump in the morning most days and I drink the mother's milk tea (not sure that does anything but yeah). And I'm almost at two months which is awesome since I thought it might not work at all. Also I don't pump for her milk because I didn't want to stress about it and was fine with her having formula at night but the morning pumping has been enough to give her some nights feeds.

I was kinda depressed in my first trimesters with my first two pregnancies. I was also stressed at the end. I've never had postpartum depression just normal wobbles. With my second I did go manic when he was three months and then crashed when he was eight months. I was always functional and taking care of my kids though. But yeah. I went on meds when he was 12 months.

Sorry this was probably way more than you wanted to hear but I just really want to help you. I hate to think of people not having babies because of bipolar. People pull it off but it is an uphill battle and we always have to deal with more than other people . And even a normal uncomplicated pregnancy has so much stress in it. But if you're willing to run through the fire go for it (I know that everyone is different and sometimes you may be willing but still can't do it so I'm not at all trying to say it is a matter of will. Believe me I know this illness is not about will).

I am glad I went for the third. A lot of my stress was and is with my other kids. If I didn't have other kids already I would totally go for another one after my experience with this last pregnancy but I do feel like I am done now. Three kids is crazy stressful!