Not sure if this is the right place to post this...

I'm not sure if I have general intimacy issues or if physical intimacy is my major problem. I'm 30 years old and a virgin. I've been on plenty of first and second dates, but have really never been in a relationship. It seems like as soon as someone is interested in me, I freak out. I stop returning phone calls and basically run. I was on a second date last week that went well. At the end, I know the guy was expecting at least a hug, and, like an idiot, I got in my car as fast as possible, and I pretty much never want to see him again.

The idea of sex is appealing, but the reality of it completely terrifies me. I've never dated anyone that I've been at all interested in having sex with. Obviously I've never been in a relationship where we've even gotten close. I've just really never "felt" anything for anyone. I just completely shut down. I want to get married and have kids, but at this point, I'm not sure that that can ever happen. I can't figure out where this comes from, I've never been abused, I have a supportive family, and, while my family is very religious, I never gotten the message that sex was "bad."

I'm just frustrated with myself and am starting the feel the crunch of time. My friends have been married for years and just about all have a couple of kids. I feel like I'm "flunking" this stage of my life.

I wrote this more to sort out what was going on in my head, but any insight would be appreciated. Thanks.