About to see pdoc in a bit. Guess I'll tell her my suividal thoughts and plans. Why not? I feel miserable and really don't care if I live or not. I'm tired of being the horrible burden. I feel like my abusivd stepmom with my irritabity and I don't want that. I'd rather not live than be like her. I just feelike crap. The anxiety from a Saturday night flashback isn't gone yet and I feel insane and sick from it. This is all stupid.

Idk if she can even help me.