Thanks for your response. I don't know if it's the benefit of accumulated experience or some kind of mid-life epiphany (I just turned 45, so I figure I'm due for some kind of mid-life something soon), but instead of contemplating and reacting to only the latest in a 25-year-long succession of manias, depressions, consequences and regrets (i.e. "Wow, that latest one was the worst yet! Costly and hurtful, too! Sure wish that hadn't just happened!"), I've begun to see my disease as a bigger picture, something profound that has consistently plagued me and disrupted my potential and progress since college. I've found this change in perspective significant as it has caused me to see and respect the disease as more profound and powerful than only the latest episode, and I have come closer to, but not yet accomplished, forgiving myself for my illness and my failures. Those who treat or otherwise fully understand our predicament tell us that our disease and its consequences are not our fault, but I still haven't been able to internalize that absolution. Returning to your response, yes, at the risk of obsessing over it, try to keep your circumstances in mind even on the good days (especially on the really good days), and be careful with potential disruptions like sleepless nights, recreational drug use or stress, any of which could potentially result in a rapid relapse. Best of luck to you and thanks again for your feedback.