Hi, I'm from UK too. You are certainly not mad. I am near the end of Stepps programme and your story is similar to others I have heard. Many people on the course had Emotion Intensity Disorder (old and, I think inappropriate name Borderline Personality Disorder). Check symptoms, doesn't mean you are mad or bad if they apply, just you have very powerful, easily triggered emotions. There is help.
Be kind to yourself. Have a hug in solidarity.