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breathe said:
Hi all,
As the title says, I think I am in love with my therapist.
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How much do you know about transference? I ask this because if I didn't know a lot about transference, I'd probably think I'm in love with my therapist, too. All the feelings are there-- but I know where it's coming from.
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He feels more like a friend than a therapist now.
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What are the main reasons that he feels more like a friend than a therapist? I mean, I understand that you have his phone numbers, you text msg., etc. But why does it FEEL like he's a friend, not a therapist? As far as my therapist, he understands me more than anyone in the world ever has-- he has helped me in ways I never thought someone could-- but the line is very clearly drawn, very defined-- he always has, and always will feel like my therapist.
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I have his mobile number, and his house number. And his work email address and personal email address. He texts me, and I text him.
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Need more info. here-- How did this transpire? How did it come about that you got both of these numbers? The way you wrote it, it sounds like he text messages you first-- is this the case? Not trying to interrogate you here, just want a sense of what is going on.
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We have hugged 3 times. We have spoken about his personal life, I know all about his family situation. He is the most amazing guy I have ever met. He knows how I feel about him, but it just hurts so much that I can't do anything about the way I feel. I want to be with him.
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Not trying to be hurtful, just want to be honest here-- this is why I do not believe in physical contact between patient and therapist-- no more than a handshake. When transference is at its strongest, and there is physical contact, the lines can become easily blurred. Transference revolves around emotions that can almost be too intense to handle... if you couple this with physical contant, the emotions can easily get out of hand, confusing, and at times, damaging.
You mentioned that he knows how you feel about him-- how did he respond to this?
I hope you can get this straightened out with him.