I just cracked and another episode of depression has striked my unprepared. I had been doing good since summer and I thought I'm fine and stable and here it comes. I'm really upset that there's no support around, noone I can tell about my illness, get a hug or cheering up. I sent SMS to my husband telling how bad I feel and asked him to be kind on me and he just answered that I'm threatening him and stupid stuff like that. I have an evening and following weekend ahead and I really don't know how to live through this. I'm waiting for husband to came home, bringing kids from school and I'm afraid I can't handle it. I'm all in tears and having those really bad suicidial thoughts. And then I know the kids need their attention and I know that husband will be angry with every little think the kids or I do wrong.