realising theres no point of trying to improve myself... i cant be healthy, no matter what i do or how hard i try im still stuck here and cant sleep...

tonight i have to stay up all night with white noise blasting in my ears at full volume and its STILL not enough to drown the noise out. i also have to stay up on wed night because i need to go out at 8.30

with this much sleep deprivation (caused by others not me) how can i possibly be healthy? why bother? i give up...