Hi Luned - thanks for sharing your experience on this precise topic.

There are indeed a lot of good things. I have chosen/had to accept a number of things that aren't my preference of course. He's an absent minded professor type and that can be maddening. I care about my surroundings and I like things put back where they came from so I don't have to play the where-did-it-go hunting game. I could say a lot more and I just deleted half a paragraph. I wish I had someone to talk to about this.

And something for the women's room, I suppose - he doesn't understand that smelling bad is a giant turnoff that doesn't disappear when he finally gets around to bathing. The chance of a pleasant day was lost in the reek. Nothing's going to "happen" after that! Fine, I married a European who doesn't believe in deodorant, but then ya gotta shower more often!

He's heard all this before. Other things are clearly more important to him, like his own comfort and convenience. He's not the least bit nasty about it, but it seems none of this stuff sticks in his head. And I feel disrespected. (He knows all this, too.)

Why the heck do (some) men think it's okay to sit around in undies all day?

And this is why coders may find it hard to get laid/married.

Getting into a bit of a rant here and finding it kind of ludicrous, really.

I'm way too patient and tolerant.


We both work from home the past few years, so it's not just focusing on him, but he is in my environment affecting it - polluting it, really.

Yeah, I need to find something to make me happy. I do not expect him to do that, at all. What did you find, if you want to say.