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Originally Posted by Helpbritt1
Thank you all for your point of views. Some I agree with some I dont. But if I 13 yearold over and over again tells u to F off..tells u her Dad told her u should die,,and she agrees eventually that face got a slap...right or wrong ..call it abuse if u like .I own that. I also no that I was slapped...many teens get a slap. . But most do not spend their lives blameing their parents slap as a reason to use drugs and alcohol..or ..abanden their child ,cheat on the husband,not payntheir bills,flunk out of college or to not hold a job. It becomes a choice to either take responsibility of her own life and future or not,,inspite of her past.... I know for sure I could have done better..I did what I could with the circumstances I had..Judge me if u wish,,,but it is time in my book for our adult children to stop getting a pass because they had confused parents doing the best they knew how....yes possibly poor parenting happened .In spite of that they should take back the control of their lives and take responsibility for their futures.
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How sad that her dad used his child to get to you ... It is equally sad that you responded to your child by physically abusing her ... The poor thing never stood a chance in the war being played out by the adults in her life!
Now she's grown into an unstable adult who most likely isn't very lovable or likable and dear old mom and dad want to be shed of the mess they've made.
Sorry, but I ain't giving out free passes to any adult who was given the gift of an innocent child, then warped that child in such a way that the adult they've become has got to clean up the mess their parents made of their life before they can even get to the point of cleaning up the mess they've made of their own life as a result thereof.
While it is true that the parents aren't responsible (financially or otherwise) for "fixing" the mess their adult children have become, neither can they deny their responsibility for creating that mess!
Again, letting go with love is best for all involved so each can start working on what is and isn't their fault, who is and isn't to blame, getting it all sorted out, and hopefully healing as best as possible and moving forward with their lives.
Sincerely,
Pfrog!
