Hi guys! I'm having a great day, GREAT, just great. I feel lighter than air, electrified, like I could do anything I want to do. I've been dancing the whole day, singing, talking, and moving. And it's been awesome.

Yup. Hypomania. There it is.

I was hesitant to label it as such because I was still tired at night, still sleeping for the last couple of days, but then I remembered I've had a cold and that **** wears you out. Tonight I don't feel tired. Today I didn't feel tired. I'd loooove to go out on the town, have some drinks, have a lot of drinks!!! But hubby doesn't want to, which is for the best I feel. We don't have the money to go bar hopping anyway. See that's why this is just hypomania, I'm still able to control my spending, knowing I have to pay bills and such. I'm able to swallow my joy and appear normal even though inside I want to just RUN AND DANCE AND PLAY.

(I danced on my own, out of sight, to get it out).

This comes after two weeks of depression, which again, I didn't want to label as such because it wasn't as bad as it has been before. It was general feeling down, feeling overwhelmed at my job, hating myself. Culminated in a huge crying episode while my husband was in the ER for kidney stones - as soon as I saw him in his gown on the gurney I just broke down. Cried for about a half hour, but he was zonked on pain meds so that was good. He wasn't bothering me.

But then I felt better. Normal. More positive. And kept feeling better and better and better until we arrive at yesterday when I was skipping through the halls at school.

I guess real stability is just a dream for me. But at least the episodes are blunted. If I can just stay out of the damn hospital for a whole year I will be happy.