Hello everyone! From elementary school I have always found friendships awkward. I was weird socially with everyone and my education suffered. I rarely felt relaxed around others and sought silly ways to get their attention. Girlfriends were rare and even today it has been over ten years since I was involved in a relationship. I have no close friends. Im a single father of 3 teenagers, two of them living with me. I work steadily and have some pretty outstanding hobbies. I lean toward the techy/geek stuff. I long for success, friendship and a partner in my life. Fear determines who I meet and what I do. I have a low self esteem and think Im unattractive. In 2013 something very unfamiliar happened to me which cost me over $50K, closed my business, ruined my reputation and placed an even greater strain on me. I suffered from a delusion apparently brought on by a manic episode of bi polar, a condition which I had not been diagnosed with. The delusion caused me to believe some pretty far out stuff, I did some damage to my home and committed crimes on my own property (no victims) which got me felonies and some very significant loss in my life. I woke up today just wanting to have light conversation with another adult and here I am. Best wishes to all of you.