For what it's worth I don't think yyou are lazy, I think you have some very valid fears and maybe some depression holding you back. The reasons you have listed for struggling with getting better are also valid

My suggestion would be to share these fears with your life coach and include her in helping you find a T. I don't thinking finding a T has to mean the end of your work with your life coach but it is understandable why you would be scared it would.

This thread I think shows the beginning of you dipping your toes in the water and exploring what scares you about healing. I am glad for you and I hope this can be the start to some conversations about moving forward.

Best of luck.