I wasn't really sure which response to reply to because I thought I'd end up rambling anyway so here's kinda one big thing.

Thank you all for the responses! Due to his age, he wasn't going through hormone replacement therapy. Also, he wasn't out (as trans) to anyone else besides me or my friends (yes, including his friends, because he didn't want his parents or other people to find out. In retrospect he has a lot more trust issues than I realized at the time). It felt like somewhere in between losing his friends and going to a school with people he didn't like, he just stopped telling people about his emotions. I tried to confront him about it, of course I wouldn't expect him to talk about being upset if it made him uncomfortable, but it interfered with our friendship greatly. And (not surprisingly) he turned it back around on me and just said he didn't like me but had feelings about other things. But that's the issue. "Things". He has feelings for things and tv shows and places and basically anything other than actual human interaction. Sometimes he shows gratitude towards his friends when they do things for him. I heard from one of his friends that she overheard him talking to his other friend and either him or his friend said I "dilute reality" (which if there was anything of the form it was a direct result of gaslighting and him being incredibly self unaware. I'm not even sure what that was supposed to mean). I never confronted him because I'm friends with the girl that I heard it from and I didn't want to cause any drama between them. I've mostly gotten over blaming myself but it's still disappointing and a little sad. It makes me sad because I tried really, really hard and at one point we were on the same level emotionally and it felt like we were completely in tune with one another, and it seemed like even after getting somewhat out of his depression he just completely backpedaled. He can see issues in things everyone else does but not in himself, even when the exact same thing is being done, and I feel like he thinks I'm too crazy or self revolved to take anything that I say seriously. I've had a small group of friends that I can talk to about it and they've been immensely helpful but I don't have anyone older or a doctor that I can talk to about it. I've been on medication for the last 2-3 years but my mom wouldn't let me go to therapy for whatever reason. I don't really trust her with my feelings either as it always turns around to being "ok, what did YOU do to cause them to do that?" or "you are so overdramatic/*****y/sensitive/whatever". She doesn't really understand the concept of emotional abuse and I'm not close with the rest of my family and I'm also not out to them (around my family he was going by his birth name/female pronouns). He was out to my mom in a small degree but I basically totally brushed off mentioning it because my mom threatened to out him to his parents when she got mad at me over something stupid. Honestly everyone around me seems like they have an emotional circus going off inside their head and it's really difficult being around so many people who are unhealthy and refuse to see it and blame it on anyone else (mostly me). I'm glad I'm out of it and I've been feeling better but when anything else upsets me it's basically like a domino effect and everything else comes out as well, including any self blame I still have left. I'm trying to undo my thought process of blaming myself but it's difficult because I feel like anyone I've ever been really close to has encouraged it to the point where it's my go-to point even when my self esteem is better. It gets really overwhelming when I'm upset and it's a lot harder to talk myself down from. I think I'm scared of being like the people who have been around me and constantly blamed things on everyone else. Whenever I would tell my mom she was treating me badly, it would come back around to me being selfish or blaming my problems on other people. But I have a fairly good perspective on my emotions and I can usually tell when I'm being irrational (if anything I end up being overly critical) and if I'm upset over something that seems silly it's definitely because there's a bigger issue. I feel very disappointed. Not really because it was my fault but more because I really thought he was better than that. And I feel like he interpreted this as "you have emotional problems because you no longer like me" and "I have no desire to talk to you anymore because we're not dating" but that really wasn't the issue. It's that the timing of everything seemed too weird to be coincidental and he was never straightforward enough with his feelings that I was completely blindsided when he said he didn't like me anymore. It was really hard to accept especially when it felt like maybe he did still like me somewhere but couldn't - or wouldn't - express it because it was too much effort and I begun to stress him out. I've accepted that he genuinely stopped liking me but it's still hard to feel like it wasn't intentional like he intentionally distanced himself from his feelings just because he didn't want to talk about them. He always said he didn't know how he felt and he blanks out his feelings to the point where he can't analyze them himself. It made it really hard to fully grasp what he was saying but all of this makes me feel kind of bad or manipulative because I should assume that he has a better understanding of his own emotions than I do, be he would literally say "I don't know how I feel about you" minutes before saying "I don't like you anymore". It was hard not falling into some terrible thought process over it and I'm still trying really hard not to blame myself for how my thought process ended up due to how unhealthy it was. I guess I was confused to the point where I needed an answer just so I could stop hating myself over it.

I'm sorry that ended up being a wall of text. Being able to rehash this all out has made me feel better especially since I've kind of run out of sources to talk to about it, not necessarily that my friends are no longer supportive but rather they've all already heard this entire story. I really, really appreciate having someplace to talk about this.