One of my t's told me it's possible... Except maybe schizophrenia tho they are highly regarded in some places as people who can talk to god etc...

But anyways. I have C-PTSD, bipolar, borderline tendencies and an ED.
And now that I am learning about therapy and DBT and CbT, a whole lot of ****ed up thinking. Like my mind is seriously broken. I don't even trust what I think anymore. I use to think I was so clever but I don't think I am...

Anyways. I want to be cured of this ****. I want to know what a 'normal' life feels like. To just be able to hang out with people and feel okay about being there, let people get close enough before I push them away. Just 'be'.

I don't know if I can tho. If trauma happened in early childhood does the actual 'me' even learn to grow? Sometimes I feel like I am stuck in such immature thinking patterns. This **** makes no sense.

I am so frustrated. I want my sweet oblivion back I think. Knowing has made me to hyper vigilant to how I may be acting or thinking wrong. Ugh. It's exhausting.