((((Olivia)))) it is completely understandable you are feeling this way. Please take care.

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OliviaC said:
She thought I should be grateful (my interpretation) that she was keeping me on for med. visits as she said she's giving up more of those to some of her underlings. I don't really want to see her again, but feel stuck because I need my xanax scripts.

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I think it would be healthiest all around if you didn't continue to see her. JMO. Every visit will be stressful because of the past rupture. Why not see one of her underlings for meds? Or perhaps better yet, go to see a pdoc who is outside of this clinic? It's all sounding a bit incestuous to me.

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Since my therapist reports to this pdoc, I feel it will be a bit of a sticky situation for her when I see her this coming Wednesday - how can she say anything bad about her boss? I need to have her support right now desperately though!

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Olivia, I think your T will err on the client's side and provide therapy to you as her top priority. You are not asking her to badmouth her boss, you will just be sharing your feelings with her about the situation and how you were lied to and betrayed. She will be listening to you and empathizing, but she doesn't have to say anything bad about her boss to do that. She can just say things like "I can see why you feel betrayed" etc. She will not be able to mention your conversation to her boss, due to therapist-client confidentiality. If you are unsure or feeling insecure about this, please raise it at the beginning of your session. You could say something like this:

"I was recently lied to by my pdoc and I'm feeling very betrayed and would like to talk with you about that. I just wanted to verify that our conversations are confidential, right? And check to make sure this is not a conflict of interest for you, since my pdoc is your boss."

You could also discuss with her your dilemma of what pdoc to go to for your meds. Maybe she can give you some good referrals to pdocs outside of the clinic. And if she is unable to do that, wow, I would say she has major conflict of interest.