Can't very well diagnose as PC is peer to peer. Anger can be symptomatic of various forms of depression. Some of your post leaves me thinking, that yes some type of hobby could help, even volunteer work. If not adverse, seeking a clinically trained therapist can help you learn what's the driving force to feeling like exploding in anger.
How long were you with, your first bf? It's not usually fair to say, in hindsight any party of a relationship was solely at fault.
Sent from my LGMS323 using Tapatalk