((rainwind)), you are not alone with this deep inner challenge, it is actually one very common challenge expressed by many of the struggling members here. Many are told in many ways when they are children to "keep quiet" and "don't bother me". This becomes deeply engrained, so much so that finally talking about childhood challenges typically leads to feelings of "I am doing something wrong by telling and will be judged poorly for it".

That is a cognitive distortion that is very common, it is a lie even though it feels like it is true, it's just feelings that stem from one's childhood messages put upon them by their "dysfunctional parents and family members".

(((Gentle Caring Hugs)))
OE