You're right one can´t expect to have a strong emotional connection right away. I think in my situation now it´s much about intuition and how I apprehend this T to be.

As I haven´t chosen this T, I´ve only told her I´ll think about if I want to proceed into therapy I do think she might think it´s not a good start if I present several things I´m sceptical about or don´t like.

It´s very true the thing about feelings around never getting the former T back. I seem to never stop crying over this.

I assume it´s better doing something than nothing, that is go into therapy instead of just sitting at home doing nothing. But as I have to pay for therapy myself, the wrong choice has severe consequences as you don´t get your money back if not satisfied.

The thing with this is also that there´s no question at all I could ask this potential T that would give me an answer as there is no answer. I mean, she could never, out of obvious reasons, tell me if the emotional bond will grow or not, if it will be strong enough or not.