I realize that I had dealt with transference issues most of my life jumping from one transference to another starting from as far back as 6th grade and experiencing transference with my teacher who was well in her 50s and I was just a child. I remember thinking I was just "crushing" on her but looking back now I realize she was the void in my life and pretty much took the place of my parents that were emorionally unavailable to me. Of course I kept most erotic transference to myself thinking I was just weird for crushing on all these people in authority that were not even reasonable to be with.

Now I feel the same way about my therapist. I made a list of why, if I was to be in a relationship with him it would not work (age-difference, he has children around my age that I have zero desire to be a stepmom to, I'm married, he is married) so logically I know it's the dumbest thing ever and we both have a lot to lose but I still have this sexual feelings towards him. I think about him almost nonstop. I had to delete his number from my phone because I found myself constantly texting him every moment I was upset. Im pretty much restraining myself from not calling his office. Right now I told myself "don't call him until Tuesday". I hold on to his words when he tells me how much he cares about me (is that even appropriate?)

So anyone else dealing with this? its almost impossible for me to tell him this. Is it possible to get I over this without bringing it up in session?