Hi !

I don't find comfort in thinking over and over again... So, I thought about talking over here with you.
I met this guy at work 3 years ago. He was working in another city but he has to travel often for his job. I had a big crush on him right away and couldn't speak to him for about 2 years BUT finally, I sent him an email.
I was in a LDR with him during one year, had some "break" where he has to think about his expectactions, he figured out that he wanted to build some thing with me. Until last October when he broke up with me because the distance was really tough for both of us. I was really sad.
A month later, he texted me to tell me that he is moving in my cit and that he wants to be with me. So, we went back together in the end of November.

December was awesome. He was lovely and confident. He asked me to help him to find furnitures and the apartment because it will be ours sooner. Although, we started to fight and argue a lot lately. I did not realized how much he will have to travel for his job. I was more irritable when he made some activities without me because I was thinking about the fact that I will be alone often in the future.
I have a lot of temper and I am getting angry easily. That's my big problem. I often "broke up" with him...but it was to get a reaction (I know, this is really really bad and I regret it so much!). Also, he has a personality disorder (but I don't know which one... I know he saw a doctor 9 years ago but did not tell me which disorder it was) and he has mood swings (not that often. I don't think he's bipolar or something like that).
For example, his birthday was at the beginning of February. He missed 3 days of work doing nothing, without showering himself or changing his clothes. Usually, he takes a shower every morning and even in the evening sometimes. He was unable to do some things.

Well, I concentrated my efforts on remaining calm and understanding with his job and his interests. During a week, we were really happy together. We had fun, cuddles, hang out, sleep in each other arms, book a weekend in two weeks, saying "I love you" (him mostly) etc...
A sudden change arrived in the middle of the week and he has to leave for work (in his old city) on Wednesday. Everything was fine and I did great to handle my feelings. I was really proud of me.
During 2 days, he initiated the texts (good morning, enjoy your meal, have fun tonight). Also, I asked him to come at my place on Friday night. He asked if he could stay over for the night. I said "yes" and we were both correct.

On Friday, I wrote to him to spend a good day and that I will see him tonight.
He wished me a good day too. Around 3, he sent me a text saying that he was on his way. I answered on 5 (after work) to say that my day was done. He said "That's good" and I knew that something was wrong. He said everything was wrong, that he misses his friends and his city, that he want to do what he wants when he wants it without hurting someone, that the last month was terrible, that he did not like the adjustments he made, etc...
He also told me that he has not the same aspirations in life like having kids (well, it changes often) and for real, he gave me this example : "I want to go in Florida when I'll be retired... but you don't like the sun." Yes. I'm 23. He's 32. Being retired is not even in my mind but he already know I want to go in Florida in winter. Finally, he said that it was not me, it was him. Ahhhh, classic.

Until Friday, he called me (I couldn't respond). He texted me on Saturday morning to say that he called last night. I said "Ok" and he answered "Ok" back. On Sunday night, he wrote me "Why did not you answer?" I said I was busy. He said "Ok" and 30 minutes later "Sorry for bothering you".
I called him on Monday finally to ask for my things. He asked me if I had something to say and I said no. Really ? He said. I told him that he already knows that I don't want to lose him and I did not want to end it as I said on the phone Friday night.
He said : Like... you did not even try to keep me. You did nothing. I always tried to keep you when you wanted to leave.
I said that if he did not try to hung up the phone fast, he heard me saying I did not want to lose him. Also, I told him I did nothing wrong to beg for him to stay. That he gave me bad excuses. That I know I gave him hard times lately this month but I'm working on myself. I told him why I was leaving him in the past (to get a reaction). He did not notice.
I thought he was regretting his rash decision... but until Monday night, he ignores me.
I called him twice, sent him an email (with his own email where he told me he wants to build something and bla bla bla) and a single text. Still nothing.
I'm so confused. I don't want to lose him. I knew about his mood swings but I don't want to see him as a disorder but as a human being. I think he needs a counselor. I do have a counselor and it helps me a lot. I love him a lot.

Is someone is dealing with that kind of behavior ? I don't think it is really consistent. Does he ?
What should I do ? He almost asked me to beg him to stay. What the ... he wants ?