I've depersonalized through mania. And everyone was out to do me, or bury me in the woods. Everyone was in on the scheme and I prepared myself to be murdered, but it never happened. To beat it I tried to get arrested and pulled out of the situation but all I got was a ticket. I can't believe my mind goes there but it does beyond my mental control. I get ya. I hope you are seeking pro help. Get the proper DX and the help you need