This is what I think you misunderstand. The questions you have for her ARE the therapy. They are not to be asked before you decide to proceed with therapy, but rather they are the content of the therapy itself.

There is a reason you are sending her repeated emails with these questions. The questions themselves aren't as important as the fact that you are sending them. You had three evaluation sessions yet you still want more. You say you weren't attempting to continue the evaluation via email, but you were. If the email was about anything other than scheduling, it belongs in the T's office. Behind those emails are dynamics that should be addressed in order for your therapy to succeed, but you have to make an appointment to do that.

I think a DBT group would be great for you, and a T who specializes in personality disorders.