I took my advice that I gave to someone else today and called my T. Then I had to go to work but she left a nice message on the recorder for me. I had to sift through 27 messages to get to it. Sigh. But I knew it would be there.

Work was strange. I don't belong there...well not in the employee area. My space is out on the sales floor away from my co-workers. They have massed in back, their movements and the disorder overwhelm me. Today I stayed away from that as much as possible. I put order into my books and made signs for my shelves. I almost finished half the book section today. I couldn't tell anyone about picking my dog up...not until the end of my shift. This older woman came in to look at our dried herbs. I helped her a lot. Her feet hurt so I had her sit on a bench by the herbs while I got the stuff she wanted to buy measured and rung out. She decided to stay awhile longer, I told her to relax as long as she wanted too and if she needed anything to let me know. About an hour later she came up to the counter with a couple of more herbs. I was making more signs. I stopped and washed my hands then a person handed me the bathroom key and I washed my hands again. I told her I couldn't stand the keys. I measured her herbs for her and started talking with her and next thing I know I am telling her about Golly. I have never seen this woman before. She offers me some comfort she has mixed in a bottle. It is salt and someother things. She keeps it hidden while the others walk by then pours a little in my hands. I felt tingling up and down my arms. It was tangible evidence that she truely cared about the pain I was going through. Then the phone rang and I had to answer it and I couldn't give her a proper goodbye. I wished I could have thanked her for what she gave me in that moment. She gave me something that I could ask the people who are close to me for. I wish I could understand this but I can't.
Carrie