This post is to diagnose by text and out of speculations. Noone can read that much out of a text to say things like
"I don't see a recognition of the T in the room as a separate individual. I suspect Ts are seeing much the same thing."
You donīt know the whole picture and still you seem to believe you have the right and perhaps also knowledge to make statements like this. How could you know if my questions to this potential T were of a kind that would undermine our relationship?
Just because itīs a therapeutic setting every complaint or opinion donīt have to be about personality disorders, lack of control or whatever. This scheduling thing that came up with this T could be translated into many other situations like scheduling appointments with your physician or a dentist.
Quote:
Originally Posted by feralkittymom
"The T experiencing negative transference seem to be a bit of a clue to all heartbroken people here at PC. I now talk about posts about being abandoned in some way or another, a too common problem as it seems. How is it even possible that a T canīt receive this? Isnīt it a part of the healing process of the client? I think I know that much that Iīm sure itīs the way it should be.'
No, it isn't a part of the healing process. If a transference is sufficiently negative to undermine developing a working alliance, the T ethically should end the therapy, or not begin it.
There's a difference between projecting negative feelings about a person in the past onto a T within the process of working the feelings out (all competent Ts should be able to work with this); and projecting a holistic negative perspective of a T that excludes the possibility of the client experiencing the T as an independent participant in a relationship. There has to be enough space in the client's perspective of the T and the therapy process to allow for the possibility of a working alliance to develop. In its absence, therapy cannot succeed, and it would be unethical for a T to pursue therapy under such a condition.
Given the sorts of concerns you've raised in your threads, and the twisting and parsing of their responses in order to make them fit your preconceived ideas of their meaning, I don't see a recognition of the T in the room as a separate individual. I suspect Ts are seeing much the same thing. I can't help noticing the same pattern in your responses on your threads: you only "see" responses in the ways that reflect your opinions. I have to assume this is also true in your interactions with the Ts, and maybe others in your life. I think the recommendation to look for a T who treats personality disorders might be helpful. Not because of the specific diagnosis, but because it would screen for Ts who have the expertise and willingness to work with the broader pattern of relating that may be causing these preemptive ruptures. But your challenge if you want to pursue therapy will be to choose a T based upon their credentials and record of experience, rather than your personal reactions to them.
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