Welcome to Psych Central. Sorry to hear you are in such distress. You really might want to consider getting to a psychiatrist to get medications that will help ground some of the energy and keep your thoughts from running rampant.

When thoughts of suicide are present, it is a good idea to have a safety plan so if things get out of control you have the numbers you need to call right there in front of you. Here are some articles on Psych Central that discuss making a safety plan.
Psych Central - Search results for Safety plan suicide

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I try to get exercise, yoga and other gentle stretching exercises and meditation to help me get started in the morning.

By the way, I did read the whole thread.