I don't know if it will make you feel any better, but I've screwed up BIG TIME making expensive business investments while manic. Although I've been lucky enough to realize profits (also the results of manic decisions) well in excess of my losses, I feel constantly guilty and anxious because my family's finances are currently under unnecessary pressure due to my mismanagement. Business and investment can be as much about losing as they are about winning, and my losses are at the expense of all who depend on me. This year I should to be able to rebalance our debts and assets, establish and maintain safer, sustainable finances, and hopefully free myself of these terrible feelings of failure.

I felt pressure to make money in investments as it became obvious that my worsening illness would preclude me from the compensation and security that the conventional careers that my friends and relatives had developed, and I was encouraged by initial successes that didn't prepare me for the possibility or expectation of failure. Now I know that the illness can also sabotage my ability to prudently invest and do business. I'm trying to do as I advise others: forgive myself, learn from my mistakes, and move on.