I just came back after watching a movie titled "Badlapur"(Hindi). Literal translation is Revenge-land. Its is quite an emotional movie (not action stuff). Its about a guy who looses his beloved wife and only child killed during a bank robbery. The movie starts with an african proverb... ' The axe forgets but the tree remembers'. The songs in that movie made me cry. It has set me thinking...

My depression was triggered due to failure in winning the woman I loved. The associated shame heaped on me, by people around me, also played a big part.Maybe I was not up to mark and so I didnt get the attention I desired from that woman, hence I will let that go. But I was (& still am) hurt by all the indirect jeering and booing which happened behind my back (& sometimes in my face). That public shame played a big part in destroying my confidence and esteem. It pushed me into depression.

If the following sounds like bragging, forgive me, but.....I do have some talents and I can become big. I have my own software business which could make me big, both in terms of money and fame. But due to my depression I have quit working. However I do feel I can come back. I am now 33 & unmarried, not working, poor and lagging in both career & personal life.

Now, I FEEL LIKE TAKING REVENGE ON ALL THOSE WHO PUT ME DOWN/INSULTED ME, especially that woman's boyfriends. I want to take them near death. All those suicidal thoughts which used to haunt me (& those bottomless pits of sadness & end of life feeling) , I want them to feel similar pain. But people always say revenge is bad. I dont know why it is bad if it is executed well.

Please tell me why I should not take revenge. THEY SHOULD PAY THE PRICE FOR HURTING (destroying) ME ISNT IT ?