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To quote one of my friends when I was once obsessing over a guy I wasn't even dating yet, "You just gotta ride it out."
I've totally been where you are, multiple times. It suuuucks. It consumes you. But it does taper down and end, eventually.
I've gotten angry and I've gotten to acceptance. The thing about getting angry is that it's a form of resistance: Think about what happens when you try not to think about something. You wind up thinking about it.
It's really hard to stop, I know. Part of it may be that you don't want to let go, you want to find a way to make things right.
It's not about accepting the thoughts, it's about accepting the situation. And that in itself is also very hard.
How long has it been since you lost your ex? And your friend?
Is there any way you can contact your friend and ask what happened?
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"Every person, on the foundation of his or her own sufferings and joys, builds for all." ~Albert Camus
Cymbalta, 60mg -- for the depression.
Latuda, 40mg -- for the paranoia (delusional type).
Adderall, 40mg XR & 5 mg reg -- for the ADD.
Xanax, .5 mg as needed -- for the anxiety.
Topamax, 50mg -- still figuring this one out.
MDD, but possibly have some form of Bipolar Disorder. Then again, I could be paranoid . . .
Well, at least I still have my sense of humor. 
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