I'm sorry things are so difficult for you right now, Paula and that you're feeling you have no options left. I sincerely hope that you find something to help you through this tough time. Therapy might not be something that is good for your personal needs, only you can decide. Does Spain have such a thing as a "Life Coach"? Sometimes here in the States people use the service of a life coach to help them jump start their life in areas of employment, life direction, relationship etc. But it might just be a U.S thing. Hope things change soon for you.